Like any 10-year-old girl in 2000, I used to listen to “Summer Girls” by LFO all the time, but I never actually payed attention to the lyrics until the other day. Jesus Christ, what a disorganized rant of a song. Is it tourettes? ADHD? I don’t know, but I love picturing LFO trying to woo a girl with this material.

LFO: My name is Rich. You look like a girl from Abercrombie & Fitch.

Summer Girl: Oh, um… thanks? My name is —

LFO: CHINESE FOOD MAKES ME SICK.

Or “Billy Shakespeare wrote a whole bunch of sonnets,” “Macauly Culkin was in Home Alone,” “There was a good man named Paul Revere.” These guys have TONS of pick-up lines that are sure to impress the ladies.